Something powerful happens when you walk into a room full of people that is there to grow. A space that feels calm from the moment you enter, where people hold space for one another without needing to explain why. That feeling of being understood and safe thats what community has given me.

Over time, something beautiful starts to happen. You realise that every person carries there own story but there is a shared instinct underneath it.

The desire, to help and give a little hope to others.

That is the heart of every meaningful community and I am lucky enough to be apart of a group that wants to give back what they never had.

The Power of Ongoing Practice

One thing I have learned is that self reflection is important for your mental well being and is the anchor to self love. It is helpful to check in with yourself weekly- sometimes daily- depending on what your mental health needs. As doing this you can learn more about yourself, your triggers, what lights you up and what is pushing you back in life.

It is discovering who you are underneath the noise.

By doing this you can confront parts of yourself that have been avoided for years. Growth feels uncomfortable, but it is also the clearest mirror you will look into.

Feeling Understood for the First Time

Coming from spaces where you don’t feel understood or listened to, you were expected to be logical, composed, “professional” the enviroment can really shape you.

The period of your life comes when you can speak from the heart and people will understand you. Where feelings are not something to hide but something to feel proud of. Where the whole atmosphere feels safe.

Randomly, you will look back and think how was I once in a place where I felt so uncomfortable.

As someone who often feels out of place, alienated, that kind of acceptance is medicine. There is noting like finally stepping into a space and being able to breathe, speak freely and say what you truly want.

The responses you get in safe spaces? They’re unmatched. No judgment. No advice you didn’t ask for. Just understanding. Just presence.

Beginnings, Middles & Endings

I’ve been thinking a lot about how relationships flow not just romantic ones, but friendships, connections, versions of ourselves.

Beginnings– The start of something that might be magical and can help you grow and learn a lot or it could be your biggest loss and the biggest lesson you have to face. There is a sense of fear that comes along with that learning to trust your soul with another. That they have your best interests at heart.

Middles– This is probably the easiest stage, as you know the person with whom you are friends or in a relationship with and you understand each other to a deeper level. Normally, this is the happiest stage too as you feel comfortable.

Endings– The end of what once was. Maybe your relationship wont end or maybe it will. Thinking of the end is terrifying for anyone. A sense of loss, grief or heartbreak. But reflecting on it, it becomes an expansion of your self growth.

Still, endings bring grief. Even when they’re the “right thing,” you feel it. You miss the routine, the presence, the version of you that existed alongside that person. And acknowledging that sadness has opened me up more than pretending everything is fine ever did.

Change & the Emotions No One Warns You About

Change has to be one of the hardest themes a human has to face in life. Going from somewhere comfortable to pushing out of that comfort zone. It shakes your reality and the emotions that come with loss, confusion, sadness but hope for the future.

There’s no “right way” to feel when your world shifts.

Emotions move in wave numbness, denial, questioning, acceptance and meaning- making. Once, you relate these emotions into different scenarios in your life they begin to make sense. Our reactions were not dramatic or wrong: they were simply human.

Learning Boundaries for the First Time

If there’s anything that surprised me most, it’s how much boundaries matter. I didn’t have any before not with people, not with my time, and definitely not with my emotions.

One boundary I’ve discovered is around my writing. I’m protective of it. I choose who gets to see it, and I keep it away from people who might judge it before they understand it. That’s not secrecy; it’s self-protection. It’s choosing peace over explanation.

And it’s helped me realise something that boundaries aren’t walls. They’re definitions of what keeps you grounded.

Facing Opposing Perspectives & Growing From Them

One thing that truly challenged me was confronting views different from my own especially about sensitive topics around identity, justice, prejudice, and the biases we all carry.

At first, I thought it would be easy. But when you actually step into conversations like that, you realise how deeply beliefs can clash.

Instead of shutting down, I started listening. And through those discussions, I built a stronger awareness of the biases we all carry myself included.

Growth doesn’t happen in comfort. It happens when something stretches you enough to see the world differently.

The Makia Perspective

This journey has changed me. I walked in as someone with no direction, blurred boundaries, and a habit of pleasing everyone but myself. Now I’m learning who I am not the version shaped by others, but the version I’m building on purpose.

Community helped me get here.

Reflection keeps me moving.

And change as uncomfortable as it is shaping me into someone I’m finally proud to be.

Remember, it all starts with self love

-M